May 05, 2008
Awesome moment
Movies are made of awesome moments. Of course a compelling story, and characters that you care for, and overall structure are an absolute baseline that you need... but if you have a number of moments and scenes in your film that people remember the next day, the next week, and even years later... then you know you have pure gold.
Think about the movies you love. I'm sure that immediately, moments come to mind. Indiana Jones - the big ball rolling after him. The light shining through the staff and showing the location of the ark. "Snakes, why does it always have to be snakes." I'd bet that every movie you love has a number of these scenes that made an impact on you.
When I'm writing, these moments keep me going. Sometimes I'll have a great moment, one that I want to see on the screen, and it just gives me this energy to make the story and everything else awesome. It's when I've stumbled across enough of these moments that the story really comes alive for me.
All this to say, I wrote an awesome moment in Tovenray's Curse today. Lyric has just entered this mysterious world. She's been swooped up by a flying Kitty, riden by a boy named Torin. As they fly towards the woods, they are followed by a Spidersus - a flying spider. It's a WW2 dogfight in the air between a flying kitty and a flying spider... who wouldn't want to see that on the screen? It's crazy awesome. The spider is dropping webs on the kitty, constricting the kitty's wings, sending it into a nosedive. Torin is frantically cutting the webs with his sword while Lyric tries to ready a bow and arrow to shoot...
I want to see it on the screen!
Posted by jason on 06:30 PM | Comments (1)
May 01, 2008
My spec episode for the Office - the full outline
OK, so this was the latest step in writing this episode. I have to say, after writing this, I feel like I've just about written the whole episode... it's just not quite in the right format and some more dialogue as to be filled in. Read it if you want. It's long. but I'm including it just in case people are curious about the creative process for this... from short story pitch, to beat sheet, to this.
Show: The Office
Title: Going Green
by Jason Latshaw
SCENE 1 - TEASER - INT. OFFICE - DAY
Jim enters, a metal briefcase chained to his hand. Jim acts like nothing is unusual. Dwight is, of course, intrigued. Dwight, “What’s in the briefcase, Jim?”. Jim: “I would love to get your input on my situation, but this is classified. Level 25 Clearance, if you can believe it.” Jim’s cell phone rings (“24” ringtone). Jim (Jack Bauer intense): “What have you got for me on Chevensky? You are going to tell me what I want to know; it’s just a question of how much you want it to hurt. No, that’s not possible. You’ll have to upload the schematics to my phone.” Jim leaves. Dwight looks around.
DWIGHT TALKING HEAD:
“I’m the founder and sole member of the Scranton Domestic Disturbance Task Force. The last time I intercepted a parcel, which was cleverly disguised as an Amazon.com box, I seized a Terrorism Training DVD called “Fight Club.” And a copy of Halo 3. I kept that for myself. I have to find out what’s in that briefcase.”
JIM TALKING HEAD:
Jim opens up the briefcase and reveals the contents with a smirk. It’s his bagged lunch and thermos.
END OF TEASER
ACT ONE
SCENE 2 – INT. RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Pam calls Michael. Ryan wants the agenda for their monthly meeting which is scheduled for the next day. Ryan has been calling all day. Ryan wants to see it before meeting in person the next day so there are no surprises.
PAM TALKING HEAD:
Pam talks about her frustration because Michael sends all his calls from Ryan directly to her. And she never knows what’s going on. And Ryan gets annoyed at her. And he also flirts with her. “Ryan told me I’m the least competent office manager in the whole company. Then he added that seeing me is the highlight of his visits.” Kelly’s walking by... “What did you say? Did you say what I thought you said? The highlight?” Awkward. Pam: “ I don’t like Ryan very much.”
SCENE 3 – INT. RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Pam on the phone: “I know, Ryan. It’s coming very soon. He’s working on it. No, you can’t talk to him right now... No, he’s not in a meeting. Yes, he’s in his office. OK, I’ll transfer you to him.” She punches the appropriate buttons. She sees Michael in his office, his phone lights up and rings. Michael pushes a couple of buttons and transfers Ryan back to her. Pam: “Hello, Dunder Mifflin... Oh, hi Ryan. Yes, I transferred you to him. He transferred you back.”
SCENE 4 – INT. MICHAEL’S OFFICE – DAY
Michael’s distracted while he’s on the phone with Pam. He watches the “Cute Polar Bears dying” scene from “An Inconvenient Truth” on youtube. Michael, “Yes... yes... Pam. I hear you, but... this may be hard for you to understand, but there are more important things in this world than Ryan’s agenda.” He hangs up. There are tears in his eyes.
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD:
Michael explains that when he has a stressful day – like how Ryan wants an agenda for a meeting – he likes to do a google search for pictures of adorable animals to get him in the right frame of mind. It’s a trick he picked up in High School, and it’s much easier now that there’s an internet, saves him a trip to the library. It backfired, and now the weight of the world is on his shoulders. Ryan sent an example of what he’s looking for, which Michael holds up. “How am I supposed to prepare something as involved as this in my vulnerable condition?” It has three bullets of lines. On each line, there are just two words.
SCENE 5 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
Michael orders everyone into the conference room. “It’s time we change our world, everybody! Come on, let’s start a revolution.” He sings the Beatle’s “Revolution” and comments, “Best sneaker commercial ever.” People ignore him. Stanley: “We have a sales deadline to meet at the end of the week, Michael.” Michael belittles it, “That doesn’t compare to what we have to talk about.” Kevin: “You told us yesterday that we needed to treat these sales as if our lives depended on it.” Michael: “I was just being motivational! It’s like some of you have no idea what it means to be a leader.” Everyone ignores him again.
SCENE 5.5 – INT. UTILITY CLOSET– DAY
Michael opens the circuit breaker and reveals a huge amount of levels and switches. He vamps to the camera. “Time to power down the tractor beam.” He makes the “power-down” noise and switches off a number of them.
SCENE 5.6 – INT. UTILITY CLOSET– DAY
ALL the computers lose power. Dwight stands up, intense. “Everybody down! We have a situation!” He strikes a karate pose and slowly turns, checking every door and window for attackers. Michael: “It’s not terrorism Dwight. It’s eco-terrorism. The good kind of terrorism.” Every one loses what they were working on. Michael: “You shouldn’t keep electronics powered while you’re in a meeting anyway.” Andy hits the desk loudly. “I lost the sales spreadsheet I spent all morning on!” Michael: “That’s why I back up my files. You gotta back that thing up!” He dances for second, then stops himself. “The time for hilarious jokes is past. Important meeting time!”
SCENE 6 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
Michael lectures, “Now I’m going to open your eyes to a threat you probably don’t even know exists. I’m going to warn you now, it’s scary. And you’re not going to be able to look at the world the same way. There is a threat to all of us...” Dwight nods along, punctuating Michael’s talk with agreement. Finally, he cuts Michael off, “Domestic spies, right Jim?” Jim looks around like he doesn’t have the slightest clue what Dwight is saying. Michael: “No, Dwight. I’m talking about... Greenhouse Gases.” Everyone moans and gets up to leave. Kevin, “Everyone knows about that already, Michael.” Michael closes the door and tries again. “But do you know that they’re making everything warmer. Things are melting!” Angela: “We’re getting a new heaven and a new earth very soon. This one is disposable, anyway.” Michael asks them to view the tiny clip on his laptop, and no one can see it. Michael says, “You’re all going to have to crowd in closer because it’s so small,” and then can’t help but adds a “That’s what she said.” Of course, Jim picks up that this particular “That’s what she said” isn’t so complimentary to Michael, so he asks, “She said it’s so small, to who? You? What were you doing? Why were there a bunch of people there?” Michael: “I don’t get it, Jim.” Michael’s shocked and upset to find out that this impending environmental calamity is news to no one, that everyone knew about “An Inconvenient Truth,” and that no one seems to care. Phyllis says she’s already living a “Carbon Neutral lifestyle,” and that she and Bob Vance “have vowed to have as light an impact on Mother Earth as possible.” Michael suppresses a laugh. “Right, Phyllis. Right. There’s a lot of things you are. Jolly. Matronly. Punctual. But a light impact on the earth isn’t one of them.” Phyllis: “Doesn’t have anything to do with weight, Michael.” Michael mentions that Phyllis’s carbon footprint must be huge. Jim work on a cryptic sudoku on his cell phone and Dwight tries to decipher it for clues.
CREED TALKING HEAD:
Creed cared about the environment until he had a revelation that all pollution is just fake and purposely orchestrated by world governments to distract people from the larger Illuminati conspiracy. Just like the Superbowl. And crossworld puzzles.
SCENE 6 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
Michael decides they must make pledges. He bought sneakers made of recycled materials. But he learns, to his shame, that everyone recycles already, (he doesn’t – and won’t – because it’s “annoying.”) Toby drives a Prius. Michael instinctually blurts out “That car is so gay!” Then immediately, he realizes what he said, and turns to Oscar, “Which is why I want one. And why I affirm and respect the lifestyle choices it has made.” Michael promises “real lasting changes. Recycling is just temporary, because then you have to do it again, and again, and again. Blech, that’s boring. We’re going to make a difference that is forever. ”
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD:
Michael asks what kind of world it would be if you were walking down the street and you didn’t see Polar bears. That’s not a world he wants to live in.
END OF ACT ONE
ACT TWO
SCENE 7 – INT. MICHAEL’S OFFICE – DAY
The air conditioner is cranked up and Michael is visibly cold. Print-outs of polar bear pictures completely plaster the walls. Michael types furiously. Pam brings in more polar bear pictures from the printer. “These print-outs are taking up a lot of paper, Michael.” The pictures serve to remind Michael “what’s at stake.” The room is cold as a tribute to the way things should be in Antarctica. Pam: “You know, there actually aren’t any Polar Bears in Antarctica, they’re in –” Michael cuts her off, “Yes, exactly, that’s what we have to change. If we all chip in and make a difference, there can be again” Pam watches him start typing furiously. “Oh good, so that’s the agenda for Ryan, right? Because he keeps calling me. I mean, he’s calling you. But you send the calls to me. So I have to talk to him.” Michael nods and she leaves.
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD:
Michael looks disheveled. He talks about being a creative person, a writer, and not being able to turn off his creativity when it possesses him. It’s like he just gave birth. And he has a message to deliver, like Moses. He’s like Moses, if Moses ever gave birth. And Ryan couldn’t expect Moses to write an agenda right after having a baby. Because Moses would be on maternity leave.
SCENE 8 – INT. RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Michael drops a 200 page tome on Pam’s desk, his “Mother Earth Manifesto.” Michael wants copies made for everyone. Pam suggests that it might be a waste of paper and recommends emailing it. Michael says “that the environment is a higher cause – if they waste paper to save it then so be it. If we learned anything from Vietnam, it’s that sometimes you have to burn the village to save the villagers. Sometimes you have to destroy a tree to save a tree. Plus email takes too much electricity because it’s ‘electronic mail.’”
PAM TALKING HEAD:
Pam flips through the 200 page document for the camera. Many of the pages just contain clip art or one word.
SCENE 9 – INT. MICHAEL’S OFFICE – DAY
Dwight informs Michael of the mysterious spy game Jim situation. “Until I have a firm handle on the threat, I ask that you authorize me to suspend personal liberties in the office.” Michael responds that no one in the office has any personal liberties anyway. Dwight: “Michael, I’m going to need you to grant me Executive Wartime Powers for Extraordinary Situations. We have to crack down on gatherings of more than two people in the break room. The hallways are insecure. And Oscar doesn’t shred all of his documents.” Michael wants to get back to his environmental plans and end this distraction, so Michael signs the document Dwight provides. Dwight, drunk on his power, demands access to all phone calls, email, internet use, Close Circuit video, and computer keystrokes. Michael informs that he doesn’t know that information because corporate doesn’t trust him with it anymore.
TALKING HEAD MICHAEL:
Michael: “I still doesn’t understand how they could have said I misused the surveillance technology. The whole purpose of the stuff is to spy on people. And that’s all I did. So now I know that Meredith writes “fantasies” featuring her, Jim, and yours truly. (He holds up handwritten letters) Who does that hurt? If anyone, it’s an ego boost. I mean, that’s not bad company.”
SCENE 10 – INT. RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Pam calls Jim’s phone. She disguises her voice, speaking in fake russian german hybrid.
SCENE 11 – INT. JIM/DWIGHT’S WORKSPACE – DAY
Jim puts it on speakerphone. Jim: “Don’t listen to this. It’s classified.” Dwight listens to the Russian as Jim jots something down. Jim gets another mysterious call and leaves the room. Dwight takes the notepad and photocopies it.
SCENE 12 – EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY
Everyone is gathered outside. Michael rides up sweating and exhausted on a bicycle. He carries an enormous backpack. His tie looks like burlap. Toby: “Michael, the electricity isn’t working in the office, I called...” Michael cuts him off. “Ten minutes off the grid and you’re already reaching out for the fossil fuel teat, Toby? I cancelled our electrical account with Scranton Power. We need to be serious about earth friendly work habits. It was all in my Mother Earth Manifesto, did you read it?” Stanley: “No, It was dark.” Micheal: “Oh Stanley man up, your brothers in Africa don’t even know what electricity is. And they still manage to be warriors and hunters and gatherers. And you can’t even be a salesman.” Stanley: “I need a phone and a computer.” Michael beams and pulls out a small solar panel. “My phone will charge by the power of Ra, the Egyptian Sun God, in tribute to Kelly!” Kelly’s offended: “I’m not Egyptian, Michael.” Michael snorts, “OK PC Police, Egyptian-American, whatever.” Angela complains, “We can’t work in the dark.” Meredith, who wears sunglasses, disagrees. “I like the darkness, Michael. The bright lights give me a headache.” Angela: “What are those of us who don’t have hangovers going to do?” Michael opens his pack. “I’ve selling “Candles by Jan” for $30 a pop. A discounted price, and a steal, if you ask me.”
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD:
He holds a candle. “I know we’re not together now, but as the principle investor in her business, this is my retirement. So I hope you like Bonfire.” He looks more closely at the cameraman. Holds out the candle. “No, I’m serious, I hope you like Bonfire. Smell it. Isn’t that great? Only $30. You interested?”
SCENE 13 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
Each workstation is dimly illuminated by a candle. Angela: “It looks like we’re setting up for a seance, Michael.” Michael: “You’re right.” Michael takes a folded up piece of paper from his wallet, it’s a picture of the chair model from the catalog, “Does anyone know how to conduct a seance, I want to talk to her!” Workers use their cell phones, not being able to hear people well, losing connection. Oscar puts his phone against him and shouts “I gotta take a confirmation number. It’s accounts receivable. Pam, where are the notebooks?”
SCENE 13.5 – INT. SUPPLY CLOSET – DAY
Pam looks at the shelves. They are empty. Michael enters, looking proud. “No pens, no pencils, no paper, no toxins, no lead, no dead trees. I threw it all away. Actually, I threw it in the river so nature could wash it away and bring purity.”
SCENE 13.75 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
No one can really do any work. Oscar’s phone dies before he can get the confirmation number. Pam’s cell phone rings. She doesn’t recognize the number. She answers. It’s Ryan. Ryan: “Pam, I never got Michael’s agenda. We’re on our way but I’d really like to know what we’ll be discussing. Oh, hey... is this your cell phone number? Nice. Let me add this to my contacts.” Pam wants to end the conversation: “Oh no looks like my battery is dying and we can’t plug our phones in to charge them and...” and Pam hangs up. Pam asks Michael how Ryan got her number. Michael: “Pam, I explain this to you every day. You’re my assistant. I forward my calls to you. My phone died. I don’t know why, I plugged it into the solar charger all night.” He points at the darkened table, where it’s plugged into the solar charger again. “And it’s not charging now either for some reason.” Michael holds the Manifesto out to her. It’s opened to a page which says simply: “Don’t WAIST Paper!” next to clip art of a tree crying. “Did you know there are two ways to spell Waste? Tricky. I need you to reprint all of it. The Mother Earth Manifesto has to be perfect or no one will take the cause seriously.” Pam, “But can’t we just reprint that page and -” Michael cuts her off. “Don’t cut corners, Pam. How does Jim like it when you stop without... completing the job?” Pam doesn’t know how to answer. Michael continues: “I already ordered the re-prints. Pick them up at Kinko’s before Corporate gets here.” Pam has to drive across town to do it.
SCENE 14 – INT. TOBY’S WORKSPACE – DAY
Michael waits for Toby to open his desk drawer, which is packed with aerosole hair spray bottles. He makes a big deal of the discovery, calling out to everyone in the office. “Oh, look at what Toby has in his desk! Have you ever heard of the Ozone Layer, Toby? Do you think about the holes you’re punching in it when you drive around in that... happy little Prius?” Michael reaches into the drawer and pulls out plastic 6-pack connectors and grocery bags. “Don’t you know turtles mistake these for jelly fish and eat them and die because they can’t regulate their buoyancy? Sea Turtles tremble at the sight of you, Toby the Destroyer! The Scourge of the Oceans!” Michael gives Toby a trophy made of trash for being the worst polluter in the office.
TALKING HEAD TOBY:
Toby points to his balding head. “It’s pretty obvious I’m the guy who bought all that hairspray, right? I mean, how else could I maintain this style? Right?”
SCENE 15 – INT. DWIGHT’S WORKSPACE – DAY
Dwight’s desk is piled 6 feet high with mounds of huge crusty old volumes about cryptology. He looks at his photocopy of Jim’s writing from the notepad. Then thumbs through a book, looking excited, like he’s on the verge of a great discovery. Then.... frustration. Nothing.
TALKING HEAD DWIGHT:
Dwight: “I’ve cross-referenced this with some of the greatest cryptology ciphers known to man. Navajo code talkers. The Caesar code. Even the legendary Rachmonchof Encryption. Nothing. I don’t want to alarm Michael, but we’re dealing with a highly sophisticated foe.” Dwight holds up the photocopy and says, “Yspay Owdownshay: Arehouseway atway Oonnay.” It’s pig latin.
SCENE 16 – INT. OFFICE – ACCOUNTING AREA – DAY
Michael makes the rounds through the office, stopping at the different workstations to see if anyone has read his Manifesto yet. “OK, that’s actually good that you haven’t because I have a new updated version.” He replaces the old drafts with new drafts. People put it aside, don’t read it. Angela stands up abruptly. She gets a headache from the smell of the candles, and threatens to go home. “It smells like incense in here, Michael. And incense is only in the air when people are smoking pot, being Catholic, or worshiping whatever the hell Kelly worships.” Michael forbids her from leaving and forces her to read the Manifesto outside. Creed sniffs in the air like a blood hound, and ends up with his nose right against Michael’s burlap looking tie. Creed: “Flying Dutchman. I haven’t smelled this blend since that summer in Amsterdam.” Michael: “Finally! Someone noticed my hemp tie. You think I want to wear this hideous thing? I wear for Mother Earth.” Creed snips off a bit of Michael’s tie and smokes it. Kevin: “Dude, that’s awesome. You spent a summer in Amsterdam?” Creed: “No, why do you ask?”
SCENE 17 – INT. OFFICE - RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Ryan and David Wallace (the CFO) arrive for their meeting with Michael. Pam informs them that Michael will be ready in a moment. David asks Ryan for an agenda “You know I hate walking into these meetings blind.” Ryan has to admit he doesn’t have anything. David is displeased. “You really need to get an agenda from your direct reports, Ryan.” Michael overhears Ryan being reprimanded: “Still learning the ropes, huh? Not so easy making the jump from Business School to running with the big boys, huh? Hey, if you need a mentor, the offers still on the table. I’d be happy to take you under my wing.” Ryan: “Technically, I’m your boss, Michael.” Michael: “Lesson Number One, Ryan: Try not to run your business based on technicalities.”
END OF ACT TWO
ACT THREE
SCENE 16 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
It’s loaded with candles. Michael, Dwight and Andy meet with David and Ryan. David: “Someone holding a seance, Michael?” Michael gets serious. “No, do you know how? Because I’ve got this girl...” he reaches into his pocket. Ryan shakes his head “no,” and Michael picks up on the signal. Michael hands them his Mother Earth Manifesto. Ryan: “Michael, why isn’t there any electricity in the office today.” Michael tells them to be patient, all will make sense. Michael and Dwight act out being a polar bear cub and mother with their home melting (while Andy does narration and music.) The skit ends, to stunned silence. Andy claps at the performance, then stops and no one joins in. David turns to Ryan: “Do you see why I need an agenda for every meeting, Ryan?” Michael laughs. “Sooner or later, we all have to learn in the school of hard knocks, Ryan.” Ryan tries to take control of the meeting. “So, we wanted to talk about third quarter sales projections -” David cuts him off. “Ryan, could you and the rest leave Michael and I alone for a moment. I have something I want to talk to him about.”
SCENE 17 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
Pam purposely speaks Pig Latin in earshot of Dwight. Dwight, invoking his Wartime Powers, forces her to divulge the code. “I promised Jim I wouldn’t break, but... we’re acting on behalf of oppressed people in our region, and I know you can help. It’s a highly complex code called pig latin.” Dwight: “Pigs, huh? I knew they were Communists. Or maybe... Liberals.” Pam: “It’s hard to explain exactly how the code works, but the initial consonant sound is placed at the end and an ay is then added.” Dwight rushes back to his desk and can’t quite figure it out. Pam walks up behind him and helps him out... he still doesn’t get it.Pam basically gives him the whole message: “Spy Showdown in Warehouse at Noon.” Dwight checks the time, grabs his night vision goggles from his desk, and bolts towards the warehouse.
SCENE 18 – INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Dwight hides and watches a showdown between Jim and a large figure dressed in black. Jim dials his cell phone and horribly over-acts into the phone: “I’ve got six hostiles wearing explosive vests. Four of them are staying near the hostages; I expect their orders are to detonate if we make a move. The other two are roaming. I’ve got two security doors on the north east side of the concourse; both are chained but are currently un-guarded.” The figure overcomes Jim mid-sentence. Jim drops his phone. Dwight attacks, injures the figure. The figure runs off. Jim: “Dwight, you have helped avert an international incident. But promise me, you won’t tell anyone. This was all absolutely classified.” Dwight solemnly promises to keep it a secret.
DWIGHT TALKING HEAD:
“I can’t go into details. Because it’s all classified. It’s classified because it involves dangerous people who were subdued by a smarter, more dangerous person and if people realized that they worked in the presence of such a lethal hero, they would not be able to get much work done. So it’s highly confidential. Most heroic actions of this magnitude are.” Dwight smiles.
JIM TALKING HEAD:
“Dwight’s feeling pretty good about himself, which is nice, he’s been going through a tough time.” He’s facetious: “Pam and I were just trying to have some fun with him... that certainly wasn’t the plan all along.”
KEVIN TALKING HEAD:
Kevin has a scratch on his cheek. “Jim promised it would be safe, and it seemed like an easy twenty bucks....” He traces the wound with his fingers. “Dwight should really be a spy.”
SCENE 19 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
David: “Michael, that was... terrible and embarrassing. But that you would sacrifice your dignity like that tells me you have passion for this. My wife has been bugging me for months about this, and as much as I’ve asked, Ryan won’t put together an environmental strategy.” Michael: “If it’s not a website or a woman, Ryan doesn’t care.” David: “I’m afraid that might be true, Michael. But you have conviction.” Michael: “That’s something that can’t be taught.” David picks up the Manifesto. “I’m going to pass this around back at corporate, but you’ve really laid out a roadmap for us here. Thank you.” David stands and starts to leave. “Oh, and... what is that smell?” Michael: “Bonfire.” David: “Where did you get those candles, if you don’t mind me asking.”
SCENE 20 – INT. BREAK ROOM – DAY
Ryan waits. Kelly comes in. They stare at each other by candlelight. Kelly: “Remember the last time we gazed at each other by only candlelight? Remember what you promised, Ryan? Did you mean it?”
SCENE 21 – INT. OFFICE - RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Michael asks Pam to rent him a car to get home – the bike ride exhausted him. Dwight offers to give him a ride. Michael: “Oh, no. No! Only Wussies bum rides like that! What kind of example would I be setting? An environmentalist can’t drive his own car, all by himself, he always needs a little driving buddy because “it scares me to drive all by myself... look at me, I’m the wimpy little treehugger.” No, I’m going to show them that you can love the earth, and drive a big, beefy, manly car. And Pam, I do need a a bigger car, to carry the bike.” Dwight reminds him the Avis at the train station rents that Hummer. “Yes! Exactly. A Hummer. Now there’s a car that will say, “I’m an environmentalist, but I’m still cool.””
ANDY TALKING HEAD:
Andy hits the wall in frustration. “Ugh, shut out. Goose egg. Shooting Blanks. Swing and a miss. Not one. Not one sale.”
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD:
“We learned that a good green policy helps, not hurts, business. In the end, it all comes down to a little phrase my mother used to whisper in my ear when she tucked me into bed. “What would Jesus do?” Jesus didn’t use electricity. He never drove a Prius. And he rejected all brands of hairspray. And I’d like to add that Hitler... did all of those things. So, you figure out which side you want to be on. Jesus. Or Hitler.”
Posted by jason on 03:50 AM | Comments (6)
April 29, 2008
Pushing through.
One lesson I'm learning here is how to face despair, or lack of inspiration, or just general laziness (or the potent combination of all three.) Yesterday and today, I forced myself to just write the Tovenray story. I'm becoming a real believer in the advice to "finish it badly." That's infinitely better than not finishing it at all. Once you have that initial lump of clay at least somewhat formed into something, it's much easier to refine.
If you don't write the pages, you have nothing.
I've found that there is no "quality" correlation between pages that are hard to write and pages that are easy to write. Sometimes the easy stuff is brilliant, sometimes it needs to be completely re-worked. Same with the difficult stuff.
"Finish it badly" is really just taking the pressure off so that you finish it at all. In reality the chances that it's actually bad are the same as any other time.
It's a discipline. A very difficult discipline to develop, because there are so many aspects of creativity that it's always tempting - especially for me, who loves the thrill of inspiration - to just wait for God to walk into the room and let those magical moments do all the work for you. But those bursts of inspiration are pretty rare. To be a consistent storyteller (or songwriter, or anything creative) you have to develop muscles that force God into the room, even when you don't believe there is a God. Even when you don't believe there is a room.
Yesterday and today, I rewrote the 19 pages I had already written (cutting them down to 14) and then wrote 8 shiny brand new pages, too. Not bad. I'm back into the story. Another crisis averted. These times are actually monumental for me, because as an inspiration junkie in the past... it might have been another six months before I started writing again.
Posted by jason on 12:11 PM | Comments (0)
April 28, 2008
Procrastinating
I have to admit, I'm in a funk for Tovenray's Curse, my latest screenplay. I have to break out of it today and tomorrow, but where my normal routine is to write pages every day, I haven't written anything since last Wednesday's class.
Fortunately, I'm learning to procrastinate while doing other things that I actually really have to do. So I put together most everything bureaucratic for the season of Screenwriting Competitions, which took a tremendous amount of time, while rewriting my screenplays. I worked a lot on my comedy spec for the Office. I read more screenplays and made notes for my internship at Maguire.
And now it's just me and the blank page and I have to move on.
On thing that was quite helpful was that I went on a hike with Lyric and Ollie yesterday and they wanted me to tell them the whole story from start to finish. To see the way they responded to it and liked it encouraged me on the strength of the story. In fact, I told Lyric that my instructor wasn't like it so much so far and she looked at me amazed. "Why, doesn't he like good stories? Who wouldn't like it?"
So that's the audience I need to write for.
Posted by jason on 01:39 PM | Comments (9)
April 26, 2008
Rewrites
I dedicated yesterday to re-writing, and literally spent from 5 pm to 3.30 in the morning rewriting my Harriet Tubman script (working title: Her 14th Mission) and a comedy called Retro Band. I cut Harriet from 138 pages 120 pages (and actually lost very little actual scenes... it was just getting rid of redundancy and desciption and lines that didn't need to be there) and cut Retro Band from 128 to 120.
It was exhausting, but both scripts are better now...
I'm tired.
Posted by jason on 01:52 PM | Comments (0)
April 18, 2008
My Office Episode Beat Sheet
For my spec, my assignment this week was to beat out all the action for the episode. Here's where it is right now.
Show: The Office Title: Going Green by Jason Latshaw
SCENE 1 - TEASER - INT. OFFICE - DAY
Jim enters , a metal briefcase chained to his hand . Dwight asks what’s in the briefcase. Jim: “That’s confidential.” Jim’s cell phone rings (“24” ringtone). Jim: “I’m on my way.” Leaves.
ACT ONE
SCENE 2 – INT. RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Pam calls Michael. Ryan wants the agenda for their monthly meeting, been calling all day. Ryan wants to see it before meeting in person the next day.
PAM TALKING HEAD: Pam talks about her frustration because Michael sends all his calls from Ryan directly to her. And she never knows what’s going on. And Ryan gets annoyed at her.
SCENE 3 – INT. MICHAEL’S OFFICE – DAY
Michael is distracted while talking to her on the phone. He watches “Cute Polar Bears dying” from “An Inconvenient Truth” on youtube. Michael ends the conversation. Tears in his eyes.
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD: Michael explains that when he has a stressful day – like Ryan wanting an agenda for a meeting – he likes to do a google search for pictures of adorable animals to get him in the right frame of mind. Now the weight of the world is on his shoulders.
SCENE 4 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
Michael orders everyone into the conference room. “Turn off your computers first.”
SCENE 5 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
Michael lectures. He asks them to view the tiny clip on his laptop, and no one can see it. (“You’re all going to have to crowd in closer because it’s so small.” “That’s what she said.” Jim: “She said that, to who? You? What were you doing?”) He’s shocked and upset to find out that this is news to no one, that everyone knew about “An Inconvenient Truth,” and that no one seems to care. Mentions that Phylis’s carbon footprint must be huge.
CREED TALKING HEAD: Creed cared about the environment until he had a revelation that all pollution is just fake and purposely orchestrated by world governments to distract people from the larger Illuminati conspiracy. Just like the Superbowl. And romantic love (or “and sex” or “and the g-spot” or “and oral sex” whichever is funniest).
SCENE 6 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
Michael decides they must make pledges. He bought sneakers made of recycled materials. But everyone recycles already, (he doesn’t because it’s “annoying.”) Toby drives a Prius. (Michael: “That car is so gay!” To Oscar: “Which is why I want one. And why I affirm and respect the lifestyle choices it has made.”) Michael promises “real lasting changes.”
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD: Michael asks what kind of world it would be if you were walking down the street and you didn’t see Polar bears. That’s not a world he wants to live in.
END OF ACT ONE
ACT TWO
SCENE 7 – INT. MICHAEL’S OFFICE – DAY
Air conditioner cranked up, Michael’s visibly cold. Print outs of polar bear pictures completely plastering the walls. Michael types furiously. Pam brings in more polar bear pictures from the printer. The pictures remind Michael “what’s at stake.” The room is cold as a tribute to the way things should be in the Antarctica. Pam points out there aren’t polar bears in Antarctica. Michael says, yes, exactly, that’s what they have to change. He types again. She thinks it’s the agenda.
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD: Michael looks disheveled. He talks about being a creative person, a writer, and not being able to turn off his creativity when it possesses him. It’s like he just gave birth. And he has a message to deliver, like Moses. He’s like Moses, if Moses ever gave birth. And Ryan couldn’t expect Moses to write an agenda right after having a baby. Because Moses would be on maternity leave.
SCENE 8 – INT. RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Michael drops a 200 page tome on Pam’s desk, his environmental missive. Michael wants copies made for everyone. Pam suggests that it might be a waste of paper, suggests emailing it. Michael says that the environment is a higher cause – if they waste paper to save it then so be it. Plus email takes too much electricity because it’s “electronic mail.” After he leaves, Pam calls Jim’s phone. She disguises her voice, speaking in fake russian german hybrid.
SCENE 9 – INT. JIM/DWIGHT’S WORKSPACE – DAY
Jim puts it on speakerphone. Dwight listens to the Russian as Jim jots something down. Jim gets another mysterious call and leaves the room. Dwight takes the notepad and photocopies it.
SCENE 10 – EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY
Michael rides up sweating and exhausted on a bicycle. He wears a really strange linen looking suit, and carries an enormous backpack. Everyone is gathered outside. No electricity in the office. Michael says he shut it off, to kick off earth friendly work habits. He asked if anyone read his missive yet. No, It was dark. He opens his pack, he’s selling Jan’s candles for $30 which is a discount. His suit is made of hemp, and he made it himself.
SCENE 11 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
Michael threw away all the pens and pencils and notebooks in the office because those things are wasteful (lead and toxins). No one can really do any work. Phones are dead. Michael charged his cell phone overnight with a solar charger. But it’s dead. Michael finds a typo in his missive (spelled “wasteful use of paper” as “waistful use of paper.”) and tells Pam to reprint all of them. She has to drive across town to do it because they have no electricity.
SCENE 12 – INT. TOBY’S WORKSPACE – DAY
Michael waits for Toby to open his desk drawer, which is packed with aerosole hair spray bottles. Toby receives a trophy made of trash for being the worst pollutant in the office.
TALKING HEAD TOBY: Toby points to his balding head. “It’s pretty obvious I’m the kind of guy who needs all that hairspray, right?”
SCENE 13 – INT. DWIGHT’S WORKSPACE – DAY
Dwight looks through huge crusty old volumes.
TALKING HEAD DWIGHT: Dwight can’t crack it based on any of the arcane cryptograph techniques he knows. It’s pig latin. “Pyso Howdownso: Arehousewo Oono Ommorowto.”
SCENE 14 – INT. OFFICE – ACCOUNTING AREA – DAY
Michael makes the rounds to see if anyone has read his missive yet. No one reads it. Angela gets a headache from the smell of the candles. She gets up to go home. Michael says she can’t, forces her to read the missive outside. Creed snips off a bit of Michael’s hemp suit and smokes it.
SCENE 15 – INT. OFFICE - RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Ryan and his David Wallace (CFO) arrive for their meeting with Michael. David asks Ryan what they’ll be discussing. Ryan says he doesn’t know.”You really need to get an agenda from your direct reports.” Michael ushers them into the conference room.
END OF ACT TWO
ACT THREE
SCENE 16 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
With all the candles, it’s better set up for a seance. Michael hands them his environmental missive. Michael and Dwight act out being a polar bear cub and mother with their home melting. Ryan starts to talk, but the Manager asks if he and Michael can be alone.
SCENE 17 – INT. OFFICE – DAY
Pam purposely speaks Pig Latin to Kelly in earshot of Dwight. Dwight insists she tell him what code that was. “Pigs, huh? I knew they were Communists. Or maybe... Liberals.” Dwight cracks the code, checks time, grabs night vision goggles from his desk, and bolts.
SCENE 18 – INT. WAREHOUSE – DAY
Dwight hides and watches a horribly over-acted showdown between Jim and a large figure dressed in black. The figure overcomes Jim. Dwight attacks. The figure runs off. Jim tells Dwight he has helped avert an international incident, but that they can’t tell anyone.
DWIGHT TALKING HEAD: Dwight won’t go into details because they’re confidential but he knows he’s a hero.
JIM TALKING HEAD: Jim says Dwight’s feeling pretty good about himself, which is nice, he’s been going through a tough time. Of course, that wasn’t the plan all along.
SCENE 19 – INT. CONFERENCE ROOM – DAY
Michael’s presentation chokes the David up. David really likes the way the Bonfire candle smells. Michael is commended for his environmental strategy and sells a lot of Jan’s candles.
SCENE 20 – INT. BREAK ROOM – DAY
Ryan waits. Kelly comes in. They stare at each other by candlelight. Kelly: “Remember the last time we gazed at each other by only candlelight? Remember what you promised?”
SCENE 21 – INT. OFFICE - RECEPTION AREA – DAY
Michael sees off Ryan and the manager after their successful meeting.
MICHAEL TALKING HEAD: We learned that a good green policy helps, not hurts, business.
ANDY TALKING HEAD: Andy complains that he didn’t make one sale today.
Michael asks Pam to rent him a car to get home. Dwight offers to give him a ride. Michael doesn’t like to share a car with anyone, likes to be alone with his thoughts. Michael needs a bigger car, to carry the bike. Dwight reminds him the Avis at the train station rents that Hummer.
KEVIN TALKING HEAD: Kevin has a scratch on his cheek. He says Jim promised it would be safe, and it seemed like an easy twenty bucks. Dwight should really be a spy.
Posted by jason on 04:52 PM | Comments (3)
April 13, 2008
Comedy Spec - the Office
I know I have waffled back and forth so much here, it's embarrassing. But now I've moved away from Hannah Montana again and have landed firmly on the Office.
I'm pitching three main story ideas on Tuesday. Actually 2 fully developed ideas, and then one "back pocket" idea if the teacher and class don't spark to any of the first two. Read on to see what they are.
Going Green
Michael watches “An Inconvenient Truth” and decides that the office must become more environmentally conscious. He calls a meeting where everyone talks about the sacrifices they will make in their personal and professional life. He leads off with his choice to switch to sneakers made from recycled material and filling up with gasoline that is 10% ethanol. However when he finds out that Toby drives a Prius and everyone but him recycles, he’s driven to one-up them environmentally. He arranges a Dunder Mifflen Earth Day festival, forces his staff to work an afternoon without any electricity, and attempts to prove that Toby is actually living an environmentally insensitive life. In the end he creates more waste and finally learns to simply start recycling and use low wattage lights at the office as a start.
Meanwhile, Angela wins a free makeover and wardrobe overhaul and attracts an unusual amount of attention from the men and jealousy from the woman. She becomes rather striking, and her personality changes as well. Pam has a hard time with no longer being “the hottest girl in the office” and Dwight is tortured even more than usual. Finally, when Angela finds out that Kevin is keeping a snapshot of her new attractive self as a screensaver, she quickly reverts back to her former plain, cranky self, to the disappointment of most.
________________________________
Redecorating
Michael learns about Google and Pixar’s unique offices and decides Scranton workspace is too cookie cutter. He takes the crew on a field trip to Toys R Us to liven up their office. He installs a slide from his office down to the cafe on the first floor. Ryan visits and is horrified by the misuse of company funds. But due to making a good impression on Toys R Us management, Michael lands a huge new account, causing his office’s bottom line to rise above any other regional office. As a result, the CEO of Dunder Mifflin asks Michael to draw up plans for all other regional offices.
Meanwhile, Jim starts coming to work with a metal briefcase handcuffed to his arm, raising Dwight’s suspicions. Pam plays along, leaving messages for Jim on his voicemail (which Dwight overhears) in Russian. Jim and Pam continue to act mysteriously, leading Dwight towards a confrontation with Kevin (in disguise). Dwight is convinced he helped Jim foil an international plot, which boosts his self-esteem in the face of his breakup with Angela.
________________________________
My third idea is basically that Michael enters everyone in the Office into a "Body for Life" competition. And also that Kelly arranges a "costume party" where only Darryl and she dress up in a costume, making her very angry at the rest of the office.
Posted by jason on 02:52 PM | Comments (12)
April 09, 2008
New Project - Tovenray's Curse
One thing I absolutely love about the program here at UCLA is the breakneck speed at which they force you to write. I'm still working on additional drafts on my Harriet story (watching all 6 DVDs of the Ken Burns Civil War Documentary to get a more historical flavor of the time and applying that to my pages), but already I have to start on the new story.
Tovenray's Curse is a family adventure fantasy. It could be animated. It could certainly be live action, too. This week I've been working hard, because today the "treatment" is due. The treatment is the whole story written as prose, without going into too much detail in certain areas. It's always a difficult exercise for me because "THE WHOLE STORY" is hard for me to figure out so soon in the game. But I did. Read on to check out my treatment so far.
By the way, it's my experience that the treatment and the final story are fairly different. Lots of things change when you actually start to write the pages.
Act 1 Voiceover and imagery tell the story of the beautiful KINGDOM OF TOVENRAY, perfect in every way. An evil creature, KELNIN (ageless) banishes the KING AND QUEEN of Tovenray, preventing them from ever returning with his dark magic. And now the oppressed subjects of this world wait to be set free from Kelnin’s curse.LYRIC TOVENRAY (8) nods as she thinks about what her father, AARON (35), just read to her. He and Lyric’s mother, GWEN (32), wait intently for a reaction, holding manuscripts to the story.
“Kind of a dark choice, don’t you think?” Lyric asks. “You’ll scare the babies who love your stories.” Her little brother OLIVER (5) nods in agreement. “I’m scared of Kelnin.” Lyric shrugs, her point proven. Lyric then notices the time –
And is frantic as she prepares for her eighth birthday party. She’s upset to see statues and artwork from the Kingdom of Tovenray still spread throughout her house. She begs her parents to help her put them away. But her dad can’t tear himself away from playing “Escape from the Ogritch” (which is half Ogre, half witch) with Ollie. Only her mother makes any effort to help her out. Ollie in fact actively works against her, annoying Lyric to no end.
Lyric finds, to her horror, that her parents have set up a special shrine to her, and it includes her drawings of Faeries and Unicorns and Winged Kitties. And pictures of her fencing. And her archery awards. And her dressed up in traditional Tovenranian garb.
Just as her CHIC, TOO HIP FOR SECOND GRADE FRIENDS show up, she scrambles to gather up the shrine and hide it away. She’s flush, but she succeeds. And the party goes well. Except one of the girls thought the Kingdom of Tovenray – a popular charming series of fantasy stories – was really cool... when she was 3 years old. Lyric, embarrassed, laughs along and agrees, of course.
Everything seems to be moving smoothly, until gift time. Her parents give her... a PROPHECY BOX. Ornately carved, it looks like it comes right out of a Fairy Tale. Out of the Kingdom of Tovenray, where it’s a “tradition” to receive a Prophecy Box on your 8th birthday. (Her parents really take this thing too far sometimes.) Lyric manages to move onto the next present without too much damage but then –
Ollie walks into the room, carrying much of the Shrine Lyric thought she had hidden away. Her friends laugh at the drawings, of a picture of her dressed as a princess in Tovenray.
Lyric is ASHAMED and FURIOUS, and runs to her room and locks the door, declaring she HATES her family, HATES Ollie, and wishes she could stop being a TOVENRAY.
Her parents try to reason with her through the door, telling her to stop saying she hates these things, that words have power – and Tovenray’s words have even more power.
Lyric says it again, louder.
Later that night, Lyric is drawing at her desk, a new creature. It’s cute, kind of like a teddy bear. She’s hungry, but won’t leave the room. It’s raining and LIGHTNING FLASHES. And in her room, the creature she was drawing is now sitting on her bed. She can’t believe it, says she knows she ate too much sugar at her party. The creature is so friendly and tells her it’s here to make her life perfect on her 8th birthday.
It offers to take Ollie away to a place where people will really appreciate him, and make it so that no one even remembers him in this world. In fact, the creature will even make her parents forget about Tovenray, and make them normal parents. In her anger, Lyric agrees.
The cute creature becomes momentarily fearsome as it takes Ollie from his bed. He’s scared and looks to Lyric for comfort. She realizes what she has done, and tries to stop the creature, but fails. The creature opens a plumbing access in the closet, revealing a VAST CAVERN. Amid multicolor sparks, the creature and Ollie enter the cavern.
Lyric screams and follows into the darkened cavern. But she’s GRABBED from behind.
Her dad pulls her out of the access nook and back into Ollie’s room. She’s crying, frantic. Her parents can’t figure out why. They don’t remember having a son. There was no creature. Ollie’s room isn’t decorated like his room anymore. The plumbing access isn’t a cave, it’s just a hole in the wall with pipes in it.
It’s just a bad dream, they comfort her.
She wakes up the next morning the center of her parent’s attention. And all traces of Tovenray are gone from the house. This is the perfect life. But she can’t forget Ollie’s eyes as he was taken from his room.
She goes back into the plumbing access in the wall. She enters the cavern.
Act 2
She creeps forward and hears things moving around her, sees dark shapes moving in the shadows. She breaks into a run, trying to get away from some creatures that are after her. She reaches the mouth of the cave and nearly runs over a STEEP CLIFF. She stops short, caught between a rapidly approaching creature in the cave and the drop off. And it’s raining, thunder, lightning.A FLYING BLUR OF MOVEMENT swoops in and picks her up just as a fierce creature leaps from the cave and falls over the cliff.
She’s riding through the sky on the back of a FLYING KITTY (just like the ones she draws) and beside a elven looking teen, TORIN. As they fly, Lyric looks down on a desolate, dark, damaged world. “What is this horrible place?”
Torin answers, “Let me show you how it should look.”
They land in the most perfect grove and every little girl’s dream ensues. Faeries and tea parties and dancing and just this honeymoon period for Lyric. But then she remembers. Ollie.
She tells the story of her birthday and Torin instantly knows that Kelnin is behind this. He realizes it was her 8th birthday and asks what her Prophecy Box said. She admits she never opened it. Now they must go to the Wise Prophet and get her prophecy so she knows what to do.
Cut to Ollie, who’s imprisoned by Kelnin. But Kelnin is being seductively nice, playing on Ollie’s worst instincts, grooming him to be his rightful heir. Kelnin has a daughter, CHANCE (8) who thought she would be the next ruler, but she’s too kind hearted to impress Kelnin.
Lyric mentions her last name, and Torin is amazed. He takes her to a secret ruin, an old castle where a band of rebels lives. There she sees cracked stain glass portraits of HER PARENTS as KING AND QUEEN. They are the banished rulers of this land. This is the KINGDOM OF TOVENRAY. The real one, not just a storybook.
Lyric doesn’t believe it. THIS is Tovenray, the beautiful Kingdom she loved as a young girl and came to hate recently? No way.
The rebels, a ragtag bunch, look at Lyric with respect. They tell her she’s here to lead them against Kelnin. Lyric rejects that, says Tovenrays are nothing special, she just needs to save her brother. She leaves them disappointed.
Lyric wants to head towards Kelnin’s fortress, rescue Ollie and go home. Torin convinces her to do so would be madness without her prophecy.
Lyric and Torin set off for the Wise Prophet, but their flying Kitty is injured and they must walk through dangerous areas. Lyric has to remember things her parents told her, stupid stories that aren’t so stupid anymore, in order to survive. She becomes convinced that they are in Tovenray when one of their stories comes true.
They are met by Chance, who warns them that Ollie is turning into a bad boy. Lyric must save him, because Kelnin has planned a ceremony that will solidify Ollie as his evil heir. In a week.
Lyric decides she needs to go get Ollie without the prophecy, they are wasting their time. She needs to save her brother now, whether they have the prophecy or not.
Lyric rejects Torin, leaving him behind, and journeys with Chance. They realize they look very similar. Lyric dresses up like Chance and makes her way into the fortress, past the guards.
Lyric has a confrontation with Kelnin, who reveals himself as truly evil and scary.
Lyric visits Ollie in his opulent room – they have a nice moment together... To escape the castle, which Ollie doesn’t really want to do, she makes him dress up like a dwarf. He doesn’t want to dress up like a dwarf because dwarves are little and he’s becoming a big boy.
They have an annoying fight. But she convinces them they have to go, and they escape, just barely. And only with the help of Torin, who was shadowing them.
Torin takes them back to the ruined castle, where everyone is thrilled to see the Tovenray children. Finally, the curse will be lifted. Ollie is the son sent to break it. Ollie loves the attention, and Lyric gets jealous... she doesn’t get why it all has to revolve around her annoying little brother.
Lyric tells everyone that it’s time for her and Ollie to go back to their world. She came to get him, and their job is complete.
There will be no restoration of the kingdom. The ragtag bunch of rebels begin to fight with each other, tearing apart whatever community they had... their hopes dashed.
As Lyric and Ollie make their way back to the cavern, they walk through a peaceful town just as it is attacked by Kelnin’s army (who fly over the landscape on Winged Hairy Spiders, it’s very scary) and Lyric sees how horrible life is with Tovenray under a curse. She sees a little girl (who she made an emotional connection with earlier) crying.
She turns back towards the ruined castle.
Kelnin does not call off the ceremony which will solidify Ollie’s evilness. He predicts tthe boy will be there... senses something in Ollie that will make him a good heir. Senses that Ollie wants it.
Lyric and Ollie’s entrance into the ruined castle pulls the rebels back together. Lyric pulls together a few of their best fighters (herself included, with the archery and horseback riding training and all), and they fight off Kelnin’s forces from the nearby village.
Word of this magical little girl and her brother inspires more subjects of Tovenray, who gather at the ruined castle. People start to restore the castle. A fractured stained glass portrait of the King and Queen is fixed and lifted so the sun can shine through it.
They free more villages, claiming more and more of Tovenray. Lyric and Ollie start working together, learning more about each other’s strengths, and they make a good team. Ollie actually saves Lyric at one point, and she grows to appreciate him more.
Of course, this is all driving Kelnin crazy. He disguises himself as that cute creature that visited Lyric on the night of her birthday and heads out into the woods.
Lyric has a clever plan for how to restore the kingdom, based on things she learned from her parents and her own unique smarts. Ollie doesn’t like it. They disagree... in front of everyone. He pushes all her buttons, like only a little brother can. She tells him she hates him and doesn’t need him to win. He runs off... hurt. Lyric doesn’t follow him.
He’s found by the cute creature (Kelnin in disguise), who comforts him and takes him back to the fortress. Ollie becomes convinced that he can be king without Lyric, and a better king because of it. But in a quiet moment alone when he momentarily mistakes Chance for Lyric, he admits that he misses his sister.
Ollie’s adoption ceremony is publicized far and wide, and Lyric decides the best time to attack for the final showdown with Kelnin would be then. She’s angry that Ollie has joined Kelnin. “He’s made his choice.”
ACT 3
The plan executes brilliantly, and everything seems to be falling into place. Except the last bit. Kelnin protects himself with Ollie, where Lyric cannot hurt Kelnin without also hurting Ollie. Ollie won’t step aside from Kelnin. “We will soon be one, you see, you cannot attack me without attacking your brother.” Lyric can’t bear to hurt Ollie, as annoying as he is. Lyric puts down her weapons,Kelnin offers her a sweet deal. She can return to her world, where she and her parents will no longer be Tovenrays, and will have no connections to this world any longer. Ollie will stay among people who love him and be their king.
It’s the life she always wanted. She just has to sign away her rights to this world. Her other choice is death.
At the mention of death, Ollie gets upset at Kelnin. He moves away from him, and throws a bow and quiver to Lyric. Lyric quickly shoots Kelnin. But Kelnin is too strong to be taken down by just her. Ollie has to show off his sword skills. They work together to defeat Kelnin.
At Ollie’s coronation, the curse is broken and their parents – Aaron and Gwen – join them, in their Kingly and Queenly regality. Aaron hands Lyric her Prophecy Box. The Prophecy reads that the Curse can only be broken when Sister supports Brother, and Brother supports Sister, and they must rule together. They are both crowned rulers of the Kingdom of Tovenray.
Posted by jason on 11:24 AM | Comments (7)
April 05, 2008
I'm in Tim Albaugh's 434
I'm happy to find out that I got my first choice for the 434 Workshop, the session taught by Tim Albaugh. Now I finally know my schedule for next quarter, and it's going to be a great lineup of classes.
Tuesdays I have my comedy writing class with legendary Fred Rubins. Wednesdays I have my 434 with Tim and then accomplished producer (and current host of a TV show on AMC) John Guber that night. Finally, Thursday nights I will have a class called "Identifying your Assets" with agent/producer Arnold Rifkin (Bruce Willis' creative partner for much of his biggest hits, from Die Hard to the 6th Sense.) The Rifkin class is set up to help us overcome issues that keep us from owning a room and being completely persuasive.
Lots of writing, lots of good times. I really do love UCLA.
Posted by jason on 12:39 PM | Comments (0)
April 02, 2008
Fred Rubin's Comedy Class
I feel very very lucky indeed that I passed the audition and got into this class, because it's going to be amazing. I can tell already. Fred is a fantastic instructor, and I'd even say based on this one class, a fantastic human being too. This is going to be quite a worthwhile experience, I can't wait.
Alas, I don't think my Hannah Montana plan will work out. I might write one anyway as practice, but in truth a sample like that would only get me work on other children's sitcoms, and I don't want to work for That's so raven or Suite Life of Zach and Cody.
I'm narrowing in on... My Name is Earl. But the Office, Weeds, and maybe even Californication are all still contenders.
Posted by jason on 04:17 AM | Comments (0)
March 26, 2008
suggestions needed
For my comedy class, our main project will be writing an episode of an already existing, on the air right now comedy.
I need suggestions. It can't be the Office, that's overdone. And that's almost all I watch in terms of comedies.
Help me. (Can't be Curb Your Enthusiasm either, that might be done).
Posted by jason on 10:43 PM | Comments (18)
A little bit of rejection
I didn't make it in to Mike Werb's 434 class. Oh well, not a big deal. Since he didn't cotton to the story idea I submitted, it's for the best. You definitely want to surround yourself with people who react well to your core idea.
I think I'm learning to handle rejection better and better. I've learned not to take it personally, to take a really wide angle view of it and see that rejection can be the best thing and really you just have to keep pounding away regardless.
Things that are too easy normally aren't worth it.
Posted by jason on 03:59 AM | Comments (4)
March 24, 2008
Audition Time
UCLA's MFA in screenwriting runs their class enrollment process is a very different way than most. Not only do you have to audition and work to get into the program in the first place. But once you're in, you need to audition and impress in order to get into specific classes. It's stressful, to be honest. But at the same time, I think they want to prepare you for the industry that you have chosen. If you're going to be in movies, you're always trying to get the next job.
For next quarter, I had to audition to get into a comedy spec writing class (where you write an episode for an existing comedy series as a sample of your work) and then also I'm hoping to get into Mike Werb's 434 Writing Workshop.
I just heard back on the Comedy class. I'm in. Another sigh of relief, as the competition was fierce, and it's tough to be told you're not funny. Apparently, I'm funny. At least a little.
Still waiting on the Werb class... I really hope I get into that.
Posted by jason on 02:57 PM | Comments (4)
March 18, 2008
Very late
It's 3.25 in the morning and a marathon writers group session just ended where we discussed all of our scripts which we're submitting for the major contest here at the end of each year, call showcase. I'm fortunate to be a in group with such brilliant people, we all really make each other scripts so much better.
I'm going to bed. Ollie wakes up in 3 hours.
Posted by jason on 06:25 AM | Comments (2)
March 14, 2008
Also, about music
When I write, I cannot listen to music with lyrics. I concentrate too much on the vocals, and can't clear my head enough to focus on the storytelling. But silence doesn't help me either. What I do is listen to really intense movie soundtracks, and lately it's all been music written by Hans Zimmer. Specifically, I listen to the soundtracks from Pirates of the Caribbean, Gladiator, Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron, and The Last Samarai.
It makes all my screenplays feel so epic and important while I write them.
Posted by jason on 02:05 AM | Comments (5)
March 03, 2008
Finished the Historic Epic
I just typed "FADE OUT" on the first draft of my historical epic. This one was a doozy, and I just know that I have a ton more work to do. Already, I know of things I need to add, take out, and reo-incorporate. But still, it feels good to have the first draft finished, especially considering the fright I got about a week and a half ago.
125 pages. Is it in my tier 1 (will get made into a movie some day) or tier 2 (i'd be suprised if it gets made into a movie some day, but maybe with a lot of work it could get there) or tier 3 (deny I ever wrote the sucker)?
Tier 1, by the third draft, when I get everything just right.
(For the record, by my own reckoning... 4 of my screenplays are Tier 1, 2 are Tier 2, and 1 is Tier 3)
My Tier 3 was my first screenplay. All of you who want to write, hurry up and get that first one out of the way! (Unless you're Diablo Cody, then just hurry up and write it so you can win that Oscar.) By the way, good for her. That's awesome. Unlike A LOT of my class mates, I'm not jealous of her at all. I think it was an excellent script and she deserves the success she gets. And I saw 'BOO" to the Diablo Cody backlash. Juno is a great film that works on a number of levels. All the haters need to cool off.
Posted by jason on 01:29 AM | Comments (4)
February 29, 2008
In the Home Stretch
I'm almost at page 100 in my historical epic screenplay I'm writing, so fortunately things are coming along fairly well. After I received the extensive notes from Colleary, and I just couldn't really move forward, because I didn't quite know where the story was.
I decided that it would be best to go back to page 1 and apply his notes, then get through the rewrite up until I was writing the new material. That way I would have a handle on the plot, the characters, and the relationships, all of which were changing.
That plan has worked out. I think the story is in a much better place now, due to the notes, and I'm psyched about how it's shaping up.
I have to be finished this first draft by Monday. I think it'll end up being very long, like maybe 140 pages when all is said and done. I'll probably have to cut it down.
My mom is in town. It's always so nice to have guests from home, makes the distance feel shorter, makes it seem more familiar out here.
Posted by elanyarts on 01:12 AM | Comments (2)
February 23, 2008
Losing my Mojo
I had a personal meeting with my instructor yesterday about my latest screenplay. And I have to say, I continue to be convinced that the man is brilliant. He gave me a number of fantastic notes, that wil really help my story.
But he's also a big time professional, and because of this, his style is to kind of assume everyone in the program is a competent good writer and do away with any of the extraneous compliments.
Now I hate to say this about myself, but I happen to like a certain kind of balance when given constructive criticism. Basically I like to hear 9 overflowingly wonderful accolades for every hit of improvement that I could make. And that's not really an exaggeration.
The ratio of my meeting the other day was not this way. And in all honesty, it couldn't be. There was only time for the stuff that would immediately help. I got those notes in spades.
But since then I was having the hardest time just sitting down and writing again. I had lost my confidence! Such a fragile thing...
One of the wonderful things that has happened here at UCLA is that I've become a part of a close-knit group of writers (we call ourselves the 431, because that's the first writing workshop you take here, and that's where we all met). We help each other, meet regularly to read each other's stuff. And when one of us is going bonkers, we talk each other down from the ledge. Here's some awesome email I got when I sent out my pathetic "whoa is me" message. (And I let them know it was pathetic and whoa is me, too)
Consider!1) You're writing something I would never dream of writing. If it doesn't have girls or guitars, I don't want it. That means you're all grown up and I'm 14. So, there's something. The reason we love this story is A) it's true and B) we don't know it. Colleary's job is not to stroke your ego. It's to kick your ass and make you a better writer. Get the love from us. Forget the UCLA faculty in that regard. They've seen it all (including people like us stopping in for a few days, picking their brains and then going off to buy houses in Malibu). We'll be thanking them (ALL of them, Doc) in a few years so bask in it. Lean into the harsh wind and know we are all fighting the most honorable of fights. We asked for it. We begged for it. Your sitting with one of the more sought after instructors we have and you've told us his knowledge and notes are awesome. Know that.
We're just students to these people. Numbers. The next batch. We're all 16 year old wise asses to them.
We (the 431) will not give over to the Writer's Lament (It's also the Actor's Lament and the Improviser's Lament, by the way.) We'll put that shit on the page and bend the reader to our demands. Bitch.
2) I am gonna hip us all to the theory of Resistance. Short explanation is anything that stands in the way of your creative flow, anything that you let stop you from rocking is Resistance and every day we have to fight Resistance like we're fighting a mortal enemy. I used to teach the SAT like this:
If you fall asleep, the SAT wins. If you get bored, the SAT wins. If you get distracted, horny, hungry, angry, nervous or scared, the SAT wins. And if the SAT wins, you don't go to college.
Same idea. Lack of praise, fear of finishing, judgment of the work before it's done, these are all the faces of Resistance.
One of my all time top gurus was a little bisexual man named Mick Napier. He was a master improviser, director and actor. He wrote some guidelines for The Perfect Actor. Here's one of them:
MAKE STRONG CHOICES: F$%& your fear. We want to see your power, not your fear. Nobody has time for your fear...
Sometimes I really miss that man. Just sitting with him made you want to go home and make something.
3) http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/10009167-fools_gold/
Anyway, get in there. You know in your gut you can. We've all seen you do it. Use whatever means you have to. This is war. You gotta order a pizza for lunch? You gotta blast the Black Sabbath until the neighbors complain? You have to go down to the beach and scream until your horse? Do it. Just punch those letters onto that page.
Draft one, baby. Don't get it right, get it written. Don't worry about good. That's our job. You just get it down on the page.
In short, f$%$ it. Write.
I love the 431.
EG
And here's another.
It's the infantile stages of a biopic draft. It's going to have some bumps the first time through. The further you get through it, the more it will come into focus so you can nail it the next time. If you need some direct feedback on pages, send them away and we'll check them out. Hold on to that confidence, because without it, you'll feel like just a crazy man with a computer. And you're not.
And from another member of the group who is also writing a "true story."
Dear Fellow Writer Of A True Story,To put it simply: Yes you can write this story and it will be brilliant.
I know exactly where you are. Take comfort in knowing that I am right next to you in this leaky life raft we call a 434. Listen to the goodness and J.J. Wise stuff there. (I may thank them all in a few years, but I don't have to like it!)
Honestly? You and I should start a support group - Biopics Anonymous. I've come to believe that what you're feeling (which is what I'm feeling) is a fundamental part of writing this type of story a - the dread, the flatness of the scenes and character's the first time through. It's a tough high to come down off of, the realizing that this story that's just been sitting there for anyone to pluck has plucked you(what great fortune!) and then you set about committing that story to paper (it already happened right, I mean it's just sitting there, begging to be told, right? It's gonna be awesome!) and it acts like any other story - like a pain in the ass that doesn't want to get into shape and be a good story. Plus, on top of that you're haunted by the fact that these people really lived. That your telling someone's story. Someone with relatives. Someone that people already know and feel they own a piece of! But you know what, if you get it out - even if it's one big glorious hot mess when you finally do (80 pages just the second act!), you can do what one day we'll be paid stupid money to do - rewrite it. And that's when - as we all know - the real writing happens.
Don't think. Don't judge. Just put it down. Even if it's wrong. Even if all the alarms are going off in your head and you know you're going to have to throw it all out. Take solace in the fact that even then - you'll know more about the story and how to write it - you'll know what not to write.Then it gets easier to bring the brilliance in and make it sing.
Just know that I am walking the exact same path, my friend. We will be brilliant in the end. Trust in the 431 and just do it.
And finally.
Jason- I can't add much to the genius advice of the other scribes....but all I have two pieces of advice: "Get to the end and start again." And "It doesn't have to be good, it just has to be done." That has saved my sanity on many an occasion. Like someone else said, just churn it out and leave it to us to help you polish it. It is a more than good start, I have faith in you, and you are a very talented writer based on everything I have seen thusfar.
And just remember....the difference between us and all those other schmucks sitting around me at Starbucks, is that we DO IT. We don't just talk about writing, WE WRITE. And then once we do that, we get trusted advice from others on how to make it shine.
And I promise you- we would not lead you astray. If we thought you were writing shit, we would tel you. I hope I can expect the same from y'allz.
I'm just so thankful, in the course of a couple of hours I get a bunch of brilliant, encouraging advice. I can't really underestimate this. I've wasted so much time trapped in disbelief of my own ability, unable to get out. One time, I didn't write a screenplay for a full year and a half after I lost in the early stages of a screenwriting competition.
That is so stupid.
And I was able to put 10 pages in today. I'm back on track.
Up to page 80. And it's going to great in the end. Not easy in the meantime, but great in the end.
Posted by jason on 02:31 AM | Comments (4)
January 11, 2008
Another one finished
I reached FADE OUT on my latest screenplay, the one kind of without a name, but I'm leaning towards "Mother's Boy." I like it, it's very different from anything I've written so far.
In case we're keeping score, here is what I've written so far, from the most recent to the oldest.
Mother's Boy - Drama
Retro Band - Comedy
Hunter of Hunter's - Crime Drama
Black Family Singers of the Church of God Hallegalujah - Comedy
The Black Death - Action Adventure
War Between the States - Historical Drama / Romance / Fantasy (this is the one that sucks).
6 full lengths is not so bad. I'm not writing the sex(less) comedy this quarter, by the way. Michael Colleary was really excited by another one of my ideas, so I'm writing that one. Makes sense to me to write the story people in power are excited to read, especially when it's one you've been wanting to write for some time. But this one will take a ton more work.
I'm ready, though. Bring it on.
Posted by jason on 04:55 PM | Comments (10)
January 03, 2008
Next Quarter
I just got some fantastic news. Next quarter I'll get to take a 434 (the main writing workshop at UCLA) with Michael Colleary, writer of Tomb Raider and Face/Off. You had to submit a writing sample to be chosen, and i got in.
I'm especially excited about this because I have an action/fantasy script that I've written that I really like, and I'd love to get a connection and feedback from a writer who's successful made one of those kinds of movies.
Posted by jason on 07:49 PM | Comments (2)
December 30, 2007
Finishing the first draft - and requesting help.
I am working on finishing the first draft of my latest screenplay during this Christmas break. I had 30 pages done, based on notes from my instructor and classmates I cut those down to about 25, and now I'm up to page 60. I think this one will be just around 100 pages when it's all finished.
So I have 7 more days of break, I need to write just over 5 pages a day. Not bad. 5 pages could be 20 minutes and it could be literally 3 hours, depending on what's going on in the story, and how the inspiration is flowing.
While I'm in the program at UCLA my plan is to always be working on 3 screenplays at a time. Rewriting the screenplay from the previous quarter, writing the new screenplay for the current quarter, and outlining and developing a story for the next quarter. Not sure if this is the best approach, but it seems similar to what I'll have to do once I'm a working screenwriter, juggling a number of projects.
i need your help about something My instructor loved my screenplay so far, except for one thing. He said maybe I could come up with a more compelling title. I actually kind of dug mine, which was "A Well Adjusted Boy." But now I'm fielding suggestions. It's the story of a intellectually precocious 12 year old boy, the son of an esteemed but controversial child rearing expert, who believes in very carefully doling out both affection and experiences to her boy. He has a traumatic experience at school and runs away with his new (and only) friend to visit a texas televangelist who he believes can change his mom into the loving parent he needs.
Any ideas?
Posted by jason on 08:46 PM | Comments (14)
