Anything (well almost), but not Everything

Hey all, here's another little thought that you might want to hear. It's about my life.

I am a person with an extremely high internal locus of control. I have always thought that I can do literally just about anything that is humanly possible if I wanted to bad enough and I worked hard enough. For example, I once thought that it would be cool to bike (yess... the kind you pedal) 100 miles in one day. So what did I do?... I rode down to Cape Henlopen from my house in PA (101.3 miles). My butt hurt and I was sunburned, but I did it. Another time I saw this really strong looking guy wearing a shirt that said "I benched 250." I thought it would be awesome to be able to benchpress 250 lbs. (far more than I weigh) so I went to the gym at school 3 days per week with my brother, Nathan, until I could bench 260 lbs. (those success stories are in my past now and there is no way I could do either of those things right now without working out a lot first). Other things I have decided to do and then just done them include all kinds of goals like learn guitar... learn graphic design programs... get A's in school... Hitch-hike 500 miles in one day... fall asleep standing up... Collect over $200 in state quarters... And hold my breath for 2 and a half minutes (I did that one in algebra class in 10'th grade).

I don't mean to sound like I am boasting. That is not my intention. I am just trying to show that I am a person who feels like I can do anything in the world and that has a lot of positive consequences in my life. So on to the point of this story.

I have been getting streight A's in school for the past several semesters, and I really wanted to end this semester with another 4.0. However, I signed up for a Logic class at school (described by the prof as an upper level calculus class with letters and symbols instead of numbers). Math has always been the hardest subject for me, but I was sure that I could get an A in this class. Well, right now, I have a B in the class. I was getting really frustrated until I had this thought in the middle of the night. I am working 2 part time jobs, I am in college full time, I am married, I don't live anywhere near school, I have mono, I am in a band... Basically, although I am a college student, I have TONS of other stuff going on in my life right now. I like to do everything that I do to the best of my ability. I love spending time with my wife, and I refuse to sacrifice that for logic. I love doing graphic design, and that will probably be a lot more important in my life that this class so I'm not going to cut back on that either. The band is so great and it is a dream come true, so no way am I going to not do something with the band so I can study for an exam. I also love to see my family and Lindsay's family whenever I can.

In the words of dear Bilbo Baggins "I feel like butter spread over too much bread." Please don't think that I am complaining. I chose to have all of these things in my life and I love them all. I also know that if I REALLY wanted an A in the class I could get it, but frankly, I like the rest of my life too much to sacrifice any of it for one grade. So here is the kicker... I still think that I could do just about anything if I was dedicated enough to do what it takes, but there simply is not time in the day to do everything and do it as well as I would like. It is a liberating feeling really. my new theory is that my life tends to seek it's own level of busyness until something starts to suffer, then I stop taking on more until there is room in my schedual.

After taking the time to write that post, I have to go so that I can do some graphic design work, some stuff for my other job, get ready to go into the studio tomorrow night, have lots of fun with Linds, and Oh yeah, I almost forgot... I need to study for my logic exam tomorrow.