Understanding in a Car

Isn't it funny, how quickly life can change? Isn't it amazing how big of an impact two seconds can make?

I just finished school last week. I have my graduation this Friday night. So there was a week of summer with nothing planned, warm weather and no work. Guapo and I decieded to go camping, I borrowed Collin's Ford Explorer, tied a canoe on top, and at 11:30 PM set out on a trip to the Pine Barrons for a river trip.

Something didn't feel right. It was dark and raining, we were starting a long trip to a rather dangerous area. I started praying outloud, in the car. I said, "God, something isn't right, and I don't know what it is, but I'm sure you do. So if you don't mind helping me out a little bit here that would be great." I thought for a minute, " should I go back?" But for some reason, I felt like I should keep going.

I was headed to Guapo's house to pick him up but I made a quick stop at Acme to stock up on our staple camping food, Ramen Noodles. Right on the front of the store was a huge sign, saying "open 24 hours, 7 days a week." Which turned out to be a lie. I walked around and tried all of the doors, getting soaked in the rain, before I finally found a tiny little sign reading "Holiday hours, 7 AM to 10 PM. I got in the car and left, soaked to the bone but with my spirits high and dry.

I was pulling out of the shopping center, and got confused at a stop light. It was a dumb mix up between a green light and a green arrow in a turn only lane. Anyway, I never even knew I was mixed up until I felt and heard a terrible crash and saw a flash of light like an explosion. I was confused, I thought I had been following the law, I thought I was driving responsibly, but I looked and over the crumpled hood of Collin's Explorer I saw a smashed and smoking car. My headlights shone in through the broked windshield and I saw a girl trapped behind an airbag.

It's impossible to put those feelings into words. there's a sudden sinking in the stomach, and unused adrenaline makes your legs shaky. I wanted so badly to wake up, but I knew that I wasn't dreaming. It's a feeling of helplessness, and a feeling of "What have I done?" I grabbed the door handle, and tried to get out, the door was stuck but I got it open enough to squeeze through. I ran over to the other car. The wheel was hanging off, the windshield broken, the whole front end demolished. Inside I could hear the girl sobbing. I got in the passenger side and Said "I'm so sorry! Are you ok?" She was sobbing and over and over she said "I'm not OK, this was my Grandfather's car, I'm not ok, my neck hurts, I'm not ok!

I stood there, in the dark rainy intersection, surrounded by countless policemen who wouldn't let me make a phone call, and watched as the girl was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance, and as my brother's totalled car was towed away.

I was miraculously entirely fine. I came out without a scratch or a bruse, I refused to go to the hospital but did manage to score nearly a world record for hight blood pressure. (It's always high when I'm nervous, and if you want to know it was 184 over 100)

So now I'm left with an odd mixture of feelings. On one hand there are the obvious horrible feelings you get after screwing up peoples lives that in no way deserved it. On the other hand, I'm just glad to be alive, glad to be unharmed. I quickly realized how much people care about me and hhow nice they are. Collin called, and sounded totally cheerful and happy. He was just like "dude, I'm just glad you're ok. Don't worrry about the car, it's just stuff and stuff doesn't matter. What does matter is you and you're fine and that's really something to be thankful for." He's trying to not even let me pay for it. (If you're wondering he's deffinately one of the nicest people God ever created). My friend with the very least money of anybody I know sent me a letter saying "look, if you need anything, just let me know, I'll help you in any way can, and I'll give you money" Laura was over at my house with flowers as soon as I got out of bed just to hang out and let me know that I have a friend.

Somehow I have a feeling, something good is going to come out of this. Maybe something good is already coming out of it... I don't know. Maybe this happened for a reason, maybe I'll learn something. Thanks for taking time to read my story. Have a good night!